torture for your own good

well, at least it's over. kristen pointed out how a propos my tag line is currently: "you know it's time that we grow old and do some shit." or, as my friend doc loc would say "a poo poo". which is also a propos come to think of it.

when kristen and i arrived at patient registration, they asked if i had my "medical wishes written down", and i just sort of gawped at her. "umm, no?" i guess it's a standard question, but it wasn't the first thing i wanted to be asked. and i don't know if "gawped" is a real word, but it's the right word.

the time in the waiting room wasn't too long before they called my name. they got me all prepped with the intravenous in my hand which stung like a bitch, and i thought i was going to be sick. the guy ahead of me i guess took some time, so i had to wait longer than usual. when i got in there, the doctor was of course, drop dead gorgeous. i thought, "i'm about to expose my ass and my intestines to an attractive doctor. well, of course. why wouldn't i?" i wasn't really all that nervous to begin with. i cracked a couple of jokes and they laughed, and then they loaded me up with the drugs. the doctor actually said "give her the works."

and then 45 minutes of the worst pain ever started. it was the weakest sedation i've ever experienced. i don't really remember anything other than crying and saying ow repeatedly and then getting more drugs and then the nurse pushing on my stomach. i eventually apologised to the nurse and told her to apologise to the doctors for me. i can't have been conscious for the entire time, but i really don't know. i guess it doesn't usually take so long (the guy who went in after me was only gone for about 15 minutes), so i don't know what the problem was. but don't ever let anyone tell you it doesn't hurt.

on the bright side, they didn't find anything unusual, but they took 7 or 8 biopsies, and i have a follow-up appointment in february. the nurse told me that the most difficult part was getting way up into my upper intestinal tract. i swear i could feel it right up under my sternum almost. i hope i never have to do that again.

the rest of the weekend was much better. me and my beau had our pre-christmas celebration, called "hannukis" and exchanged presents. he buys good presents! it's a whole new tradition involving g.i. joe, christmas crackers, chocolate, presents and hannukissing.

current music: the stars, set yourself on fire. very cool album from another great canadian band. searching for them also led me to arts and crafts which is the stars label, but also the label for broken social scene and feist. bss doesn't seem to have a decent website unfortunately. but the album i'm most addicted to right now is ANOTHER canadian band: wolf parade, apologies to the queen mary. if you go to their website, you can listen to two of their songs right there. it's not a great website either, but you can't argue with free music. and i think i can say right now that this will be my favourite album of the year. i'll have to work on a top 10 list or something for the new year...

phew, that was a long one...

just kill me now

the taste of this stuff is making me insane. and i'm starting to get very hungry. in the beginning i was downing a drink every 10 minutes, but now i'm lucky if i get one down every 20 minutes. it's taking longer and longer to drink a glass. half the time i can just barely get it down. i've been drinking it since 1:30, and i'm still not done! oh why!!!!!!!!! it's so gross. even the smell is making me gag now.

the first drink

yeah, so it smells really good. like kool-aid. but it tastes like salt water. it's a very briny, tinny, disgusting taste. and i have to drink it now every ten minutes until the 4 litres are gone. wooooo...

they say i get to look forward to nausea and cramping. also exciting.

the colonoscopy monologues

so, i thought that rather than worry and freak out, i would record. tomorrow is the "procedure" as i've taken to calling it. in 1 hour, i have to start drinking the peglyte that will clean me out from stem to stern for tomorrow. right now i'm just worked up about drinking the stuff. it seems ridiculous, but people keep telling me how awful it is. people are so kind sometimes...

i think it's working...

so, yeah, i'm not going to say anything more than...

i've been seeing the same guy that i was talking about on 11/14 for a month. our first date was on 11/17, and we're still dating. i'm not going to jinx it by going any further...

the search continues...

so, i bit the bullet and signed up for lavalife. part of me is absolutely humiliated and ashamed, but another part of me is very curious to see what happens. so far, most of the people i've browsed through seem to feel the same way. you see a lot of profiles that start "like you, i really don't know what i'm doing here" or "just looking around". there have been a few "interesting" guys. i love the ones that list their demands: no games; if you don't like dogs don't bother wasting my time. or why you should choose them: they make a lot of money or this one guy who wears an electric blue shark skin suit in his profile photo and wrote a lyric poem about his "pecker".

but, i'm currently communicating with one guy who seems like he might be all right. i think we're going to meet up for a drink this week, but after the last blind date, i could go one of two ways: i could remain optimistic that this one will be the good kind of interesting, or i could get halfway to the bar and then turn tail and run home. so far, i know that he's a professor and he's half-italian. you know how i love my italian boys. it's a good start.

blind date, the blind date!

i met the guy this evening. we met at william's coffee pub around 5:30pm. he had told me on the phone the night before that he was nervous, that his "heart was just thumpin'". he also told me that he planned on getting there early, so i'd have to look for him. seeing as he's 6'6", i didn't take that as much of a challenge. anyway, he was there before me. he is tall, but not lanky. he's also not unattractive, but i immediately think he's too old for me. it's as though i suddenly forget that i'm 30, and he's only 36. but he may as well be 56.

he's a very nice guy. very open and friendly. but the rendez-vous lasted all of 90 minutes (i told him i had to be outta there by 7pm. can't miss my shows!), and i knew that we didn't make a love connection. chuck woolery would be heart-broken (remember chuck's great laugh? and that smile!) ah chuck, where are you when i need you?

i was proud of myself for at least being upfront with him at the end of the evening and telling him that i wasn't really up for dating right now. he said he'd call to hang out or whatever. and to be honest, i don't even know if i'm up for that. i'm such a hermit. a spinster. i shall adopt nine more cats and put garbage bags over my windows.

blind date, the phone calls!

he called friday night. i saw his name on the phone, and i didn't pick up, but he left a message.

he called 2x on saturday, left one message.

i called him sunday. he's very chatty. he says he likes def leppard, and when i tell him i'm a music snob, he says "oh, you like ac/dc then?" i say no and decide not to pursue that avenue of interest. he tells me he's "average looking" and i take that as my cue to rate myself, so i say "i'm not good at rating myself". he says, "well, i mean, looks aren't everything."

he calls again sunday night. i don't pick up, but he leaves a message. he calls me again monday night. i don't pick up. then, later i decide i'm being silly so i return his call, but the line is busy - he doesn't have voice mail or call waiting. later, i discover that he doesn't own a computer. this does not bode well.

tuesday night, i call him. we set up the coffee date. i get him off the phone by claiming "my roommate just pulled dinner out of the oven". so far, the strikes: doesn't let me get a word in edgewise, and then the little i do say, he forgets. he said happy birthday to me two times in one conversation. the music is a big stumbling block. and he's low tech. i know that should be honourable, but i find it annoying. on the plus side, he seems down-to-earth and relaxed. open with the communication.

i'm dreading this "date," but it would be rude to cancel. ...right?

blind date, the horror!

i may have a blind date this week. and i'm really undecided about it. you could even say i'm conflicted. there's a part of me that is insisting that this is all a bad idea. and then there's another part of me that is trying to make me believe that i have nothing to lose. the big 3-0 has finally come to pass, and it seems to have been the cue for a lot of my friends to say "maybe you should consider lavalife".

it feels like forever since i've had a date, and i find myself thinking that relationships just complicate things. i do want to be in a successful relationship and find that person who i'll live happily ever after with. i don't want to be single, but i also don't want to find myself settling with someone who isn't quite right. but i think i'm terrified to try. and i mean, like, therapy terrified.

a woman i work with is setting me up on a date with her neighbour. i just got off the phone with him, and i'm being such a snob. he likes def leppard and motorbikes. when i told him i was a music snob, he said, "oh, do you like ac/dc?" also, he has a truck that he talks about as though it's a child, and he doesn't like to read. can i date that guy? am i being too snobby? we're going for coffee this week, so we'll see how it goes. but i'm dreading it.

sweet daddy siki

anyone who knows me very well, (i.e. has had to endure a road trip with me) will know how i love signs. if something looks like it would be fun to say, i have to say it out loud. it can be something as simple as a restaurant announcing a "stack o' pancakes" breakfast special or a repair shop offering a "tire sale". i especially love some of the signs i've seen on churches. two great examples both seen in london:

1) god loves everyone, but he loves the toronto maple leafs more. go leafs go!
2) yeah, that love thy neighbour thing...i meant that. -- god.

i don't know if this goes back to the long road trips i had to endure with my family (and which i wouldn't trade for the world), bored and car sick and trying to focus on anything to keep my mind off the fact that i just barfed in the bag that held all my archie comics.

this love of signery (signification? roadside poetry?) continued it's hold with each drive into charlottetown when we passed the north river fire department that announced local birthdays ("lordy lordy look who's forty") and bits of cliched wisdom ("today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday").

one of my favourite sign stories happened in toronto when i was driving around with my friends andrew and meadow and reading out almost everything that passed in front of my eyes. eventually, they picked up the habit as well and as we were driving along queen street east, meadow read out "karaoke saturday nights hosted by sweet daddy siki". i freaked out. sweet daddy siki was a strangely prevalent part of my childhood. when my dad was a musician in toronto in the 1970s, one of the guys he used to play with was a wrestler named sweet daddy siki. i remember sitting in the basement fiddling around with my dad's drum kit or steel guitar and staring at the picture of the big black wrestler with his white hair and white trunks, standing in the middle of a ring with his arms raised in the air.

new cool word: enigmatology, (n.) the art of making or of solving enigmas.

current music: art brut, bang bang rock n roll. you have to find this album and listen to it. it's cool, post punk, brit pop with a great sense of humour. my favourite song may be "my little brother", though "moving to l.a." is also very funny/cool. but then, the song "modern art" starts off with this great line: "modern art makes me want to rock out (wooh!)." oh forget it, the whole album rocks!

that 70s picture

i like this one, because it looks like something i would come across in one of my grandmother's photo albums. all off kilter like it's the family's first camera, and the colour is a little washed out. (i'll admit, i messed with the light filtre a bit. it's a fun toy...)

me and my babies

well, here are my boys, together in a photo. it isn't the most "together" photo. more of a snap and dash. darcy looks like if he has one more picture taken he's going to smash the camera, and bingley looks like he hasn't quite figured out where he is yet. they're pretty cute. i feel sad for my friend chris missing his cat, and i know i'd be sad without mine, even when they wretch up hairballs like tumbleweed and lick their arses all day long and cry in the middle of the night because it's time to play and bite me when i don't wake up fast enough. what would i ever do without them?

perfectly adjusted organisms

i have got to get a digital camera. there are so many funny things that i see in the run of a day, that it physically hurts that i can't post them all on here. one example, a toothless wonder on dundas street wearing a dirty white t-shirt that says "i love (heart) party girls". sigh, well, until i can afford one, i'll just have to become a better writer. and maybe that will be good for me.

the past two nights, i've watched friday the 13th parts 1 and 2 (it's the 25th anniversary). all these years as a horror fan, and i thought i had seen them. i've definitely not seen them before. and i have to say, i was pleasantly surprised. why they went on to produce so many parts (are they at 11 now?), i don't know. i have to see the third installment, but they probably could have ended after the second one. if you want to see the first one stop reading right now. i mean right now as of that period you just passed. all this time, i thought jason was the killer in each of the movies, so i was really surprised to find out that his mother is the killer in the first one. which has got me wondering now who was the first female serial killer in the slasher genre. i may have a project on my hands here.

in any case, i think it's time for coffee and reading. i just finished e.m. forster's a passage to india. i'm a big forster fan, but i've been putting of reading this book for a long time. it's such a beautifully written book, but even forster himself said after 30 years that the book was dated. i think it is in part, still quite relevant, but i guess the Anglo-India mentality is further removed from me.

most of life is so dull that there is nothing to be said about it, and the books and talk that would describe it as interesting are obliged to exaggerate, in the hope of justifying their own existence. inside its cocoon of work or social obligation, the human spirit slumbers for the most part, registering the distinction between pleasure and pain, but not nearly as alert as we pretend. there are periods in the most thrilling day during which nothing happens, and though we continue to exclaim 'i do enjoy myself' or 'i am horrified' we are insincere. 'as far as i feel anything, it is enjoyment, horror' -- it's no more than that really, and a perfectly adjusted organism would be silent.
~ e.m. forster ~

the glory of the food court

i was at the food court in the craptacular galleria today for lunch, and an old man was looking for an extra chair to bring to his table. a mother and daughter had just abandoned their table, so he scooted over there and placed his palm flat in the middle of the chair. left it there for a minute. stood up straight and paused. then moved to the next chair where he did the same thing. this time he moved his hand up and down along the seat. straightened up and paused. then moved to the next chair. did the same thing, but moved his hand along the seat a bit faster and then grabbed it and took it back to his table. very curious. i couldn't help but stare.

my boss gave me some bamboo for my new desk to welcome me back to the department. it was so sweet. bright orange and blue stones in a square glass vase and three stalks to signify happiness. how feng shui. plus, if you receive a gift of bamboo it's supposed to mean good luck. i'm going to take this all as a good sign.

just finished watching final destination 2. pretty bad, but of course being a horror buff, i'll watch the final installation when it comes out. as far as sequels go, it held more loose ends together than i've usually seen. if you can just sit down and take it for what it is, it's not so bad. one cool thing was seeing michael landes. he was jimmy olsen in the first season of the new adventures of lois and clark. he was replaced in the 2nd season, by some lame ass punk with floopy blonde hair.

man, before i expose too much geek, i should end this bit now...

current song: Kelis vs Coldplay - Nasty Clocks (Attention Deficit Bootleg Mix)

binge and purge

my job at the call centre has been eliminated. they decided (and not before time) that the "call centre" (which consists of two people with no training telling people someone will have to call them back tomorrow) just isn't working. so they've split the call duo in two. i'm going back to work for payroll and my co-worker nathan is working for benefits. this doesn't seem like a big deal, but i am so happy to be back working with my old boss that i couldn't stop smiling all day. there's also better potential for becoming full time in this position. come on big money big money big money! no whammies no whammies!

this is coming shortly after my first ever panic attack. at least i think that's what it was. i'm still not sure. about two weeks ago, i was talking to my frustratingly ditzy (and now former) boss, trying to explain something to her when my head started spinning and i felt out of breath. i ended up running out of the office and sitting on the bathroom floor shivering and hyperventilating. it was so weird. i hope it never happens again, but i think it was my body finally telling me that i can't pick up after everyone. part of the reason why i've been so remiss with my blog is because i've had nothing to talk about besides how much work sucks. the other half of the call duo is a good guy. we go for drinks, joke around and all is well. but he's a terrible co-worker. i was spending all of my time picking up where he left off. if he dropped the ball, i picked it up. everyone would be coming to me to complain about him, and there's only so much i can say to defend the guy. but now with the office changing around, i'm getting a new desk further away from his "i love triumph the insult comic dog" crap, his "you really should invest in mutual funds, put more money in your rrsp, set a price and watch the stock" tirades. look, i hate triumph and, yes, i suck with money, but i don't want a lecture from some lazy ass conan o'brien fanatic.

well, now that that's out of the way...

back in action

well, moved to a new apartment. the phone number stays the same, and i'm still in london. just found out today that we're here illegally. good times. i have to try and smooth things out tomorrow. this is way too stressful. my roommate has gone to bc for the week, work is nuts and now i find out i'm a squatter. christ.

anyway. i've been having a lot of random memories lately. i keep meaning to blog 'em, but now i've forgotten some of them. i'm sure they'll come back.

here's a gem from back in my junior high days. i was madly in love with all the sk8r boyz, and so decided that like a progressive young girl, i should learn how to skate. so i borrowed my neighbour, christopher's extra skateboard, and bought a copy of thrasher magazine (is it still in print?) and generally sucked really bad. anyway, one day i was skating down to the post office with christopher (he hated being called chris. i'd say 'hey chris' and he'd say 'topher'. anyway...), and i'm struggling all the way, and i think we even ran into another chris i had a major crush on at the time, so i was devastated. i check the mail, and lo and behold, there was a letter for me! i opened it right away, and was so embarrassed by what i saw that i hid the letter in my k-way while christopher bugged me about it the whole way home. it was a response to the first and last fan letter i ever wrote....to wil wheaton. to those of you who don't know him, he was ensign wesley crusher on star trek: the next generation. i had written the letter about a year before, and my crush had long since died. secretly, i was excited that i got a response and a picture (when you're from pei, all of these things are exciting), but it totally ruined my 'i'm-a-cool-skater-girl' buzz. he's now running one of the most popular blogs on the internet (he's old skool) which can be fun to read betimes.

so here i sit, in the dark, on a slow crappy computer, drinking a south australian shiraz called hardy's bankside. it's yummy. i highly recommend. i'm trying to expand my wine knowledge, but i won't attempt a sideways summary at this time.

on a final note, my friend doctor lockett has moved to the rock and has started a blog. he's a little long winded (who loves ya baby?!), but he's always got good things to say. i especially love the kilometre breakdown of the drive out there. if you want to check it out: http://newnewfie.blogspot.com/

hope there are still people out there reading this thing. love all y'all.

you put the man in the coconut and grease him all up

and every time i see him i wonder 'does he think he's sexy? does he think i want his body? come on greasy coconut man, let me know.' he is so repulsive. his glistening white hair on his bright red shiny body. yuck. i want you all to get the picture though.

i'm off work for a few days, and can i express how happy i am about that? i'm being productive. reading, glueing wooden desk drawers back together, getting supplies so i can paint some old chairs, packing a few boxes for the move next month. and definitely not answering phones or stressing about paperwork.

so i adopted another cat. that makes two. no more. i don't want to be the crazy cat lady. as it is, i'll probably die single. i don't want to be too stereotypical. in any case, he's one year old and his name is mr. charles bingley. a companion for the 4 year old mr. fitzwilliam darcy. i will recreate pride and prejudice. i will be jane austen...but hopefully not die of mercury poisoning in my 40s.

current music: gorillaz, demon days

yeah, so i suck. whaddya gonna do?

it's been forever i know. things have been very blah recently, and i haven't been in the best of moods for blogging about my boring days. i will blog more. i can't promise to try, but i'll try to try. so a couple of things. in the future i may refer to the following characters:

1) crazy mary - an old woman who pushes a shopping cart heaped with sleeping bags and all her worldly belongings. she likes to yell at people on the street and point out how many hookers there are just walking around pretending not to be hookers. recent quotes from crazy mary: "school abc"; "dislocated thumb"; "it has its mother". more to come...

2) greasy coconut man - he's always in the park when i'm walking home from work. the sun brings them all out. he's a hairy older man with white hair on his chest and shoulders and even a bit on his head. he wears short shorts. he lies on his side, red as a lobster, reading a book, smelling like coconut oil. need i say more? perhaps...yes.

i'm part of the mcclelland & stewart 100 readers club. they asked people to email a few lines to explain why they should get free books and write reviews of them. my lovely entry was one of the chosen ones. it went something like this: "i'm popular, i swear. please pick me." i just finished my first book: the time in between by david bergen. it'll be out in august, and i have a fancy shmancy advance reading copy. it just looks cool. to the bookies anyway...

i've become so used to analysing novels on a technical level that i'm not even sure i know how to talk about how i feel about a book. but here goes...

charles boatman is first a father, and secondly a vietnam vet. it's sometimes painful to watch the story reveal what it is this man has done and how he finally admits to his family the truth of his time in the war. like so many vietnam vets, boatman has returned to the scene of the crime to find redemption or some kind of therapy to help him come to terms with what he's done. but, also like so many vets, he doesn't necessarily find what he's looking for. following their father's disappearance, two of the adult children go to vietnam to find out what has become of their father.

i'll admit that if i read the back cover while in search of a good read, this is not a book i would generally think of picking up (i have to be very lame for a moment and say that i'll try not to judge a book by it's cover from now on). however, i found it engaging, honest and intimate. bergen is a lovely writer. the novel sometimes feels like it was written in a feverish state. half dreaming half awake. anyone who has been to asia will know this surreal feeling that is captured so well here. at times, as the characters develop, david bergen's description of the boatman family relationships is uncomfortable, almost too intimate, too stifling and yet at the same time, this is a family whose members don't truly understand one another or themselves.

so there's my plug. i liked the novel. read it. bring on more free books!

Riddle me this...

i haven't blogged in what feels like ages. i usually try to write about something interesting and hopefully funny, but there just isn't anything special going on. if anything, i probably need a vacation. i will be going to my friend andrew's cottage this weekend, but i have to get to toronto first which is turning out to be more stressful than it should be. i hope i relax by the time i get there.

i just looked at myself in the bathroom mirror, and it reminded me of when i was in junior high school and all the girls would go to the bathroom, shut off the light and chant "bloody mary" in front of the mirror. you had to say it something like 43 times and a hand (which i always pictured as green and slimey) would come out. i always chickened out at 41. in any case, i feel like i look like bloody mary. my eyes are bloodshot and i'm so tired. i'm a total debbie downer.

i was thinking of the movie grease the other day because of my pink jacket. i have an old navy pink trench that always seems to get attention. it's not just pink, it's PINK. so i was thinking that i could be one of the pink ladies. and if i were a pink lady, which one would i be? i'd like to be rizzo, but i'd probably be frenchie. in any case, then i was thinking about how it would be nice if life were like the ending of grease, where everything sucks, but then if you just put on your shiny tight spandex pants and curl your hair, you can get the boy and fly away in a car to live happily ever after. sigh...

i'm off to watch the season finale of csi and mourn the loss of frank gorshin...

ah collectors...

today at work, i got to live out a dream. i got a call from someone who didn't identify himself asking for a number for an employee. because of the privacy act, i can't even verify if someone works for the company let alone give out their phone number or work location. and because he didn't identify himself, i knew he was a collector of some sort. when i asked who he was, he said his name was steve, and he worked for an investment company. i told him that i couldn't release any information, and he started getting very angry. he told me i was making a big deal out of nothing, and that he wasn't asking much, and he was raving and going on. i said that he'd have to take that up with the government, because i could lose my job if i released any info.

steve: you're so paranoid. i can't believe you people... (starts into another rant)
me: and you're a jackass. goodbye.

it was beautiful.

bookses

it feels like forever since i've written anything. i spent a lot of this week being very bored at work and surfing other blogs. this all started after i read an article about litblogs and the huge writing community online. it really makes me miss the days when i was more involved in that scene. which makes me want to read more, which makes me want to write, which makes me hate my job more than i do already. it's vicious i tell ya.

i recently read me talk pretty one day by david sedaris. sedaris has won a few humour awards, so i was getting ready to laugh it up. the book is in two parts: one and deux. one is a bit of a let down, mostly about his drug use and some of the strange little things that have happened in his life. deux is hilarious, about visiting france with his boyfriend and deciding after 6 years that he should learn more than the two french words he knows: "bottleneck" and "ashtray". eventually, he moves to france and the descriptions of his french classes are so funny i was crying.

i'm trying to find another book to read now while i wait for a few books i ordered to come in. i'm on a roll, and i can't stop! i've been reading a lot of contemporary stuff lately. if you have any suggestions, let me know.

i'm off for some coffee. hopefully the pee lady won't be there. the pee lady is a lady who frequents william's coffee pub and smells horrifically like stale pee. if it weren't so disgusting, it would be devastating. maybe i'll forego running that risk and go to starbuck's instead. so evil...

pocket shrapnel

i was walking past the speaker's corner machine in the public library downtown and i caught a glimpse of one of the questions that is supposed to "inspire" you to record your thoughts for the local tv station, the new pl.

what do you think of the proposed $5 coin?

now, while i enjoy coins as much as the next person, i see two glaring drawbacks to a $5 coin:

a. as with the $2 coin, the evil vending machine conglomerate will see this is as license to charge more for their goods and services. or perhaps, they will go japan-style and start selling more big-ticket items.

b. it will be more difficult to tip strippers. not that i tip strippers, but if i ever were to tip a stripper, i wouldn't want to tip a large amount. with a $5 coin, the lowest stripper tip would have to be a $10 bill. that, or strippers will have to start incorporating a coin toss into their acts. maybe they already have. it just doesn't seem convenient.

thank you fat lady

the weather is gorgeous. sunny, blue sky, 17 degrees. i was in a weird mood today and decided i wanted some sugar, so i had my friend drop me off at william's coffee pub, so i could get some cheesecake or something. when i got to the dessert counter, there was a fat woman with her fat husband and their soon-to-be fat daughter standing in front of me.

fat woman: oh, the pieces are big
fat man: that's great
fat child: (giggle)

and that cinched it. i walked out. i've never felt so repulsed by food before. i've become way more conscious about gaining weight lately, and i feel like i should just go with it. i know i'm not fat, but boy, the way i eat, i could be. i've been lucky, but that won't hold out forever. sigh.

on a (somewhat) lighter note, i saw sin city last night. it was so stylish and slick. and so sleazy film noir.

current book: the life and times of the wicked witch of the west by gregory maguire. very good. people have asked me if it's funny, and when i tell people about it, it sounds really funny, but within the context of the book, it's just a story about an unpopular girl growing up. ugly, but very smart and cynical.

toronto rock city

just got back from a weekend in toronto. it was great to get out of london if only for a few days. now i have to do some liver detox unfortunately. friday night i went to a wine bar called idoru (or idaho, depending on who you talk to). it's a very lovely little place on roncesvalles, with shockingly brave white couches. after some great sangria, we all headed back to andrew and meadow's to have more beer. this was a most unfortunate choice on my part. i ended up passing out around 1am.

the next day, had breakfast at a cute place called mitzi's. asked my good buddies to take me to ikea. got to ikea. asked my good buddies to take me home. too hungover to look at swedish furniture. picture my heart breaking. months of wanting to go to ikea, i go, and i wanna barf. sigh.

then saturday night, we went to the gladstone for karaoke. andrew wow'd 'em with "just a gigolo"; andrew and geoff did a great version of "rawhide"; and i did "calendar girl" by neil sedaka. the karaoke guy even sang harmony with me. it was hilarious. oh how i miss going to karaoke. i remember tuesday nights in osaka, going bowling and then to karaoke.

sunday morning went to a place called the beaver cafe: lots of pictures of the national animal, some gnawed wood and fantastic food. and nobody cracked a joke about the name. which kinda struck me odd, but maybe i was hanging out with grownups. it's known to happen.

walked around roncesvalles area, which has a large polish community. saw a beflowered statue of the pope. there were a lot of people wearing black and a few strange families taking pictures of their kids in the flowers.

seriously considering moving back to toronto to give it another shot. knowing people makes things easier. we shall see...

google me, google you

i decided to image google some friends of mine to see if there were any photos of them on the internet, and apparently i have some famous friends. on the other hand, i suck. when i googled me, there were a bunch of old black and white photos of families in full-length bathing suits and 1970s sears portrait shots of women in their 40s.

and in other news, my personal chef and one of my best friends has gone newf. dr. christopher james lockett is now a member of the memorial university of newfoundland crew. cod tongues and screech 4 life! i'm happy and a sulky baby at the same time. on the upside is a free place to stay in st. john's. on the downside is no more gourmet meals to look forward to. props to the mun man.

two dialogues that shouldn't happen (but did) at work

guy1: hi, i'd like to update some information on your system. the person who is listed as my daughter, is actually my common-law.
me: we'll fix that right up so you don't look like a ped.
guy1: ...

guy2: hi, i'd like to update some information on your system. i'm listed as female, but i'm not.
me: yeah, you sound pretty masculine. lucky for you we do free, quick and painless sex changes. you have nothing to worry about. it'll be over before you know it.
guy2: ...

note to self: shut mouth

clarissa minus 2. it's the new math and i'm getting it

the weekend has been quiet, though i had to call the neighbour this morning at 6:30 to turn down the happenin' tunes. all i could hear (through my earplugs) was thump thump thump thump. i was half asleep and i couldn't tell if it was my heart beating through a megaphone or if there were giant bunnies getting busy.

i had my eyebrows waxed for the first time yesterday. i didn't think i had enough eyebrow to worry about, but i thought i'd give it a shot anyway. it was quick and painless. but man, i wonder what my face looked like when she ripped off the cloth.

walking around in london, i always get some drunk guy or some punk trying to be a smart ass to get some kind of reaction out of me:

do you think red heads are sexy? (and then wink or wave or grab his crotch)
hey nice skirt
my pleasure
hello (i mean, please!)

if i'm asked a question or if someone says hi, i always respond, because, for whatever reason, i worry they'll get angry. more often than not this is fine, and sometimes they're even surprised. but last summer i was walking through victoria park and this drunk guy was hanging out with his drunk friends and waved at me and said "have a good day." i said thanks and waved. and then he stopped me, told me his name was two, showed me his cell phone to prove his name was two feathers and then continued to inform me of the following:

he needed a date for some event. he didn't know where to find a woman because...
he was from "america"
he asked me: why i colour my hair, was i busy saturday night, did i believe that his name was two

when i told him i had to go because my boyfriend was sick (which was actually true at the time), he told me i didn't have a boyfriend. that he could tell by my eyes that i was single. then he asked for my name (i said clarissa - it's my standard. drunk men can't pronounce it, get frustrated and forget about it), my phone number (i said, oh no i don't think so) and told me i had a beautiful smile. i think at that point i just started to walk off.

anyway, loooooong story slightly shortened, guess who i bump into on dundas street while on my lunch break last week? two! still drunk,

2: how you doin?
me: fine thanks (smiled)
2: i love your smile
me: that's great (walked off)

i'm learning, but very slowly.

current music: the decemberists, picaresque. i've listened to it about 7 times in a row, and i can't get it out of my head. very good stuff. they make songs about lords and ladies and barons listenable again.

crazy week for poor old me

my friends andrew and geoff came down from toronto this week, and hijinx ensued. monday night drank, played poker, drank some more. tuesday went to work late and hungover. blah. wednesday night ate cheese fondue and then chocolate fondue and drank at the barking frog, then moved to molly bloom's and drank some more. then andrew and i dropped our mad scientifix on the dance floor to stevie wonder's superstitious. what a great song. it was some good craic, but i'm ready for a quiet long weekend.

the phones are quiet at work today which is nice, but the day will drag on...on the upside the people calling in are great. one guy told me he hopes the easter bunny is good to me, and another woman called me sweetie over and over again. too cute. much better than someone yelling and threatening to sue.

current music: johnny cash, greatest hits (pretty cheesy website)

i've been reading too many mcsweeny's lists

while bored at work, top 10 words you can spell upside down on a calculator assigning the numbers as follows -- 1 = I, 3 = E, 4 = h, 5 = S, 7 = L, 8 = B, 9 = G, 0 = O -- and excluding plurals and the suffix -less:

shoe
boob
goes
goose
hose
shell
goo
hog
oil
blog

rotating around the sky fire

i think everyone has years that they agonise about. turning 20 was my first nightmare. i thought that when i turned 20, all my memories from 19 under would suddenly disappear, that i wouldn't recall anything from highschool. a former professor/friend of mind said that forgetting high school wasn't a bad thing and i felt better.

i then freaked out at 24 and 27. not for any reason that comes to mind, just a random panic. and now, i'm 29 1/2 today. how gross is that? i really don't feel almost 30. shouldn't i be more mature and accomplished? and married and have a car and a house? my friend nathan says it's just a number, just 30 rotations around the sky fire. i'm totally agonising about it, and at the same time, i know it's silly. i'm always being told that i don't look my age. when i was a kid i knew age was just a number, and now it's a big, flabby, wrinkled, spinster monster with coke-bottle glasses and knobby cardigan sweaters. sigh.

i watched a very cool show on scream the other day called ghostwatch. it was a bbc pseudo-documentary broadcast on hallowe'en 1992. it was presented as a real news show with well-known bbc newscasters spending an evening with a family who claimed their house was haunted, and it ended up being the first tv show blamed for post traumatic stress disorder! it was never aired again, and just recently became available on dvd. gallons better than the blair witch project (which i won't even link, because it sucked so bad), it really follows in the steps of war of the worlds (check out mercury theatre to listen to it).

disco inferno

work is going allright. my boss was pissed off at me last week, and that was less than pleasant. it took a week of being a totally innocuous, shoot-the-shit employee to smooth things over. it's not a perfect job, but it's a job, and i'd like to keep it. and i also want to ask for benefits, so i should try not to rock the boat.

my roommate is reading dante's inferno, and we were trying to think of who to cast in the film version. this is what we came up with:

director / dante: roberto benigni
virgil: umberto eco
beatrice: monica belucci
satan: tim roth/gary oldman/ralph fiennes -- for satan's three faces
count ugolino: robin williams
archbishop ruggieri: billy crystal
charon: jack nicholson
minos: brad pitt
phlegyas: christopher walken
the fallen angels at the wall: the remaining members of monty python.
the angel who lets virgil and dante through the wall: bill murray.
cerebus: benji

more black comedy than divine comedy. it would have to be an all-star cast in any case. i'll gladly take suggestions!

well, i just got out of the shower, my hair is wet, and i'm getting cold.

here's a gratuitous shot of jude law:



current music: the streets, a grand don't come for free. oh, and if you haven't heard it, you have to find johnny cash's cover of soundgarden's "rusty cage." it's sublime.

swedish yummies

for the past week, i've been keeping a frozen dinner in the freezer at work and yesterday, when i finally decide i'm in the mood for it, it's been taken over by jack freezer burn. so, i head over to nooner's. nooner's is the kind of place where no one likes to eat, but everybody does. there's one special there that i love though -- swedish meatballs and roasted potatoes. i walked in the door and lo! i could smell meatballs. does my nose deceive me? i look at the menu and lo! once more, i see my special special. i then pump my fist at my side and exclaim "yessss." yeah, that's what i did. i couldn't believe it myself. i'm so embarassing.

i had a dream

i had a crazy dream last night that there was this evil conglomerate that wanted to create a fast acting virus. so they captured all of the olympic swimmers and shrunk them to the size of little bacteria to carry the infection so it would kill the subject quickly. what they probably did was threaten the swimmers that they would leave them as bacteria unless they did what they were told. so they had to spread this virus so they could be turned back to normal size. in the dream there was also a board game i was playing with my sister and a pirate ship. i had a sweet bike and a really nice power suit as well. but i don't know how they all fit into the "plot." i have a lot of weird dreams, but i think this one would make an awesome B movie starring christopher lambert or chuck norris as an evil scientist. tia carrere would have to be in it as well.

and just 4 years ago i hated them

yes, the proviso was that there would be no more than one cat picture, but i just love this sequence. i don't want to turn into the cat lady, so i promise that's it for a while. from now on, just gratuitous pictures of jude law.

i'm at work right now on my break. it's a busy day, so i'm loving my fifteen minutes of lame. the weekend was great though. i actually feel ready for the week today. saturday i was sitting at william's coffee pub on richmond, flipping through vanity fair and eating a strawberry caramel waffle. and when i left i realise how relaxed i had been the whole time. i haven't felt like that in a dog's age. even in spite of the guy (a) who went ape shit on a pyramid schemer (b). (b) was presenting his material like it was a serious entrepeneurial endeavour. (a) was like canada's own woody allen yelling at (b) and telling him he's a schill; "how dare you." it was entertaining. after he was done and the yellee stormed off, woody shrugged his coat up on his shoulders and said "uh, that felt good."

the battle for catalan(ding)

clarence: what...the...hell? darcy: i saw you up here, and i thought it looked nice. i hug the bookshelf all day. whaddya gonna do about it?


clarence: i'll tell ya what i'm gonna do. i'm gonna kill you! darcy: get off me you pussy.


darcy: yeah, how ya like that? clarence: what are you talking about? i attacked you. darcy: whatever.


clarence: gimme back my spot. darcy: no dice. clarence: dis ain't over

next...cleaning the litter box

long week, no blog. things came to a head with the neighbour. we had to call the cops on her. she had a party that started at 3am and went until 11am. the cops showed up 2 ½ hours after we called, but the party was still going. she was totally surprised to see cops knocking on her door. “but there are only 5 of us up there….it’s an old house.” oh my gawd. the cops took their names and told them to turn the music down. they did, but it wasn’t enough. so chris and i didn’t sleep all night. i was so angry i was shaking, and i haven’t been that mad in a long time. when they turned the “morning after” music on at 11:30, i knocked on the door until my knuckles were red, and i told the sister to turn the music off with a few other choice words. i was obsessing about it all week. i just kept thinking of all the things i should have said to her. i’m so bitter about them now. and that sux.

ah well, other than that, the weather here is cold again. though one day, my weather pixie took her hat off. i was so excited. it was like seeing a robin in the spring. today i’m going downtown to cruise the market and the used bookstores. try to take advantage of the weekend and relax. the music is playing tonight at centennial hall, and i’m trying to decide if i want to go. i’d love to see them, but the winter hermit in me is taking over. the tickets are cheap, and there are still lots of seats, so i figure i can do a last minute thing if i want.

i have a zit on my chin that’s gonna go atomic.

current mood: tired
current music: 2 picks today: kasabian (slow loading site) & the weekend (awesome site)

save the adverb

i've felt kind of off this week. no real explanation, but really wound up and stressed out and all those other verbs and prepositions. i'm looking forward to some QT this evening, so I'll take the time to calm down. eat cookies. watch a scary movie or two. i rented ginger snaps 3: the beginning (i love the ginger snaps series - and it's canadian!), the first season of the office, and from dusk till dawn.

this morning on the walk to work the snow was so thick i couldn't see from one end of the park to the next. it reminded me of a story i'd heard when i was at upei. there's a building there called dalton hall which is home to the department of education. well over 30 years ago, when upei was st. dunstan's university, dalton hall was a nurses dormitory (as my co-worker puts it: "sexy"). one of the nurses was walking across the field coming home during a really bad snowstorm. i guess she was totally snowblind and ended up getting lost. they found her the next day frozen to death in the field. they say her ghost haunts the fourth floor of dalton hall. when i had an office in the basement, i loved all the stories people would tell me about the building. i suck at retelling them, but i love hearing them.

one of my favourite lessons when i was teaching in japan was to have my upper level students tell me ghost stories they had heard. i LOVE ghost stories. but i also really like all the japanese horror movies that have become so popular here in the past few years. they can do creepy like nobody's business. although i didn't really understand ju-on...maybe when i see the anglicized, buffy-friendly version.

revenge of the dollar store umbrella

walking to work this morning was a treat. freezing rain and blowing wind. when i wasn't shuffling my feet they were shooting out from under me. my poor umbrella, she get caught in a gust and blow inside out, then she blow back in, then i stopped talking like a fisherman. then the wind blew so hard, that the umbrella closed on my face. when i finally had it propped back open again, it blew sideways and whacked me on the side of the head. then i was splashed by a transfer truck. by the time i got to work, i was wet and cranky and my umbrella was a bundle of torn fabric and broken metal spokes. but in the elevator the pr girl said she'd give me a new umbrella. so, now i have a new brolly. it's big and black and has an insurance company logo on it. but i'm happy.

we also had free pizza at work. good times! i gave out valentines to the folks at work, and they all thought i was

1. a darling cutiepie
   
2. a total nerd
3. a stalker weirdo
4. all of the above?

now i'm home and trying to decide what i should do for the evening. i've almost finished the plot against america by philip roth. it's very good, and more than a little creepy. so it'll be nice to move onto something less nazi-ish.

other than that, my weekend was busy. the valentine's party saturday night was a good time. i didn't stay too long, but i was decked all out in pink, the drinks were pink, the treats were pink. very cute. and it was nice to see my friend lily as always. sunday was game day: lord of the rings risk and poker. for about 8 hours! jinkies.

mr. darcy won't stop biting me, so i'm chasing him around with a remote control rat.

current mood: indecisive
current music: whatever's playing on x-posure with john kennedy on xfm

poster cat

so shan wrote me back and apologised. i was shocked, and now i feel like i should bake her cookies. like when you give a dog a treat to reinforce good behaviour. i know she's not evil, but i choose to believe that she might be.

i'm going to my friend lily's this evening for an unapologetically pink valentine's party. i have a great dress for the occasion, but i'm off to the mall to accessorise it with shoes. i hope. i know it's one of those laws of murphy's that you always find what you're looking for when you don't have any money. or something like that.

below is a picture of clarence as promised. i had a helluva time uploading it for some unknown reason. i've said it once, and i'll say it again: if someone from jameson marketing gets their hands on this picture, he'll be their spokescat.

i watched the brit awards the other night. i don't know half the people they're talking about, but the fact that robbie williams got 'best british single of the past 25 years' is very painful to me. i often look to the brits to save indie rock. alas.

current mood: headachy
current music: morrissey, you are the quarry


clarence and his beverage of choice

hooligana

so the list of 2005 ecma recipients is up. they did a really nice write up on my dad. i was talking to him the other day, and they had offered to fly him up from florida to cape breton to accept the award, but i found out that my dad doesn't like flying. i never knew that before. i said to him that i'd fly over if they paid for it, but that probably won't happen. i even had an idea for a speech all ready. about how when i was a teenager my dad and i had reverse roles. he was the one with the band practicing in the basement, and i was the one banging on the floor at 10pm when i was trying to get to sleep.

our neighbour, "shan", was having a party last night, and i think every super bowl idiot must have been in attendance. we had to move the bed into the back room to get to sleep. argh! it's so boring bitching about her all the time. i've composed a letter to remind her one more time to be quiet. after this, it's landlord time.


the dreaded v-day...
the candies are coming. run!

current mood: goofy, probably for watching napoleon dynamite last night.
current music: cowboy junkies, my own mix -- a couple of years ago, my office at the campus library was broken into and someone stole a laptop i was borrowing from a friend, my gym clothes (?!) and my walkman. the thing that pissed me off most, was that they didn't take the tape out of the walkman. i worked long and hard to compile the perfect cowboy junkies mix and some arsehole stole it. sigh. anyway, i hung onto that tape cover, and after much ado, i finally recompiled it. robbers and/or hooligans be damned. you can't keep a good mix down.

gracefuladies

long time no blog. it's been a busy week.

monday: just a normal day of people calling and being angry. actually, it was a rough one.
tuesday: i got my hair done. it looks good, but the guy was a total perfectionist. cutting every little strand. it took 3 hours. i shit you not. the best part was this cute turkish guy named samir who gave me a head massage.
wednesday: i went out for beer with a co-worker, which was nice, because we got to vent about work.
thursday: i went to the thee-ay-ter to see a street car named desire with my friend kristen. we're quite a pair i tell ya. when we walked in, i accidentally pulled a fake fern out of a flower pot with my coat and kristen leaned forward to talk to the teller and whacked her forehead on the glass. we're all about elegance.
friday: worked on building my web knowledge, drinking wine and eating cheese.

this week we've had my friend's cat clarence staying with us. he's mr. darcy's sleep over buddy. they're very cute together, except when i wake up and can hear them grooming each other on my pillow. slurp slurp slurp. right now they're staring at each other from across the room. but they're chillin' like villains. i'll try to get a pic of them on here sometime soon. i need a digicam!

current mood: glad that it's 0 degrees
current music: white stripes, de stijl

day of the biznitches

bad day at work. lots of cranky people, including a woman who accused me of hanging up on her on purpose. kiss my arse. anyway.

i had a good weekend, although it seemed very short. friday was my friend chris's 33rd birthday. we went out for dinner (i had potato and chickpea roti, mmmmm yummy) and strawberry daquiris. afterwards, we went to a newish bar called the alex p. keaton. it seemed tres minimalist chic for london: bare concrete floors, white walls with overpriced postcard art in big black frames. the owner was walking around looking like a member of the english beat. "play 'mirror in the bathroom'!" the 'band' that was actually playing there was pretty shitty. just a guy who wailed emphatically with his acoustic guitar. yeah, go emo-rocker wannabe.

saturday went shopping. it cheered me up immensely. watched escape from new york, which i hadn't seen before, but it was hella better than escape from l.a.

sunday, i watched i, robot with will smith. i wasn't with him, but he came with the movie. i thought it was pretty good, but it was perfectly suited to my mood, so who knows. i liked the special effects, and i was laughing like an idiot at the stupid jokes.

i really hope tomorrow is a happier day than today. keep it real, yo.

current mood: wind down mode
current music: interpol, antics

arctic pearls in my hair

just one more day till the weekend! i always look forward to the tgif emails from my friend kristen. i look forward to wearing jeans and the workflow easing up.

another bloody cold day. i keep saying it, because it keeps being true. today when i walked to work, my breath was freezing and creating ice crystals in my scarf and little frozen beads in my hair. it was totally like i was in 'the day after tomorrow' and jake gyllenhaal is like my really cute boyfriend who adores me. sigh...

one thing i did notice is that the days are getting longer. i actually had some light when i was walking home from work. the end of the tunnel it seems.

oooh, i sound a wee bit pensive, ne? i should go kill that off with some 'terminator'. i keep typing things and deleting them, and i'm not sure why. things i almost talked about:

1. unapologetically pink valentine party
2. florida via south carolina
   
3. indian food
4. cable love
5. suspense
6. regular love

anyway, like i said about the 'terminator'. arnie awaits.

1/8W+(D-d) 3/8xTQ MxNA

yep, the formula that resulted in january 24th being crowned the worst day of the year. mathemagicians like to keep busy too. it's the new math! and i'm getting it!

i'm really proud of my dad! he won the stompin' tom connors award at the ecmas (east coast music awards). the award recognises people who have been playing music for a long time, but not always for money -- more for contributing to the music community. my dad has been playing music for over 40 years, he makes his own instruments, has a radio show, plays for benefits every time he's asked and has his own recording studio. Here's some info on the award from 2004, my dad will be up there soon. it's too bad he and my mum are going to florida for 2 months, and he won't even be around to accept the award. i wonder if i can bribe them to fly me down to accept on his behalf! just kidding, but i do like cape breton. i'll have to watch the award ceremony to see if they mention him.

ok, gush, gush. i'm a proud daughter.

i got a space heater for this back room, so i don't have to die a little everytime i'm on the computer. it's huge and conical, and i can't feel the heat unless i have it parked right next to me. crap. i'll have to return it. oh well, what can you do?

one of the older women at work (a total blue hair close to retirement) threw a hissy on me today. she sent a comment to me and the entire department that i didn't think was appropriate and i asked her if, in the future, she would send those comments to me rather than everyone. well, she printed that sucker off and took it right to the manager. this woman complains if you look at her sideways, so i'm not worried, it just makes me laugh that she's in her 60s and she acts like she's still in junior high. she's a nice enough lady, and she knows her job, just don't cross her.

current mood: calm
current music: the concretes

slow down, i'll jump out

it's still really cold here. i wish that i could go into a fairy-tale style sleep from december 27 to april 2. maybe wake up for a few drinks on march 17. this is the worst time of year to me. it's cold and nasty and hard to find a reason to wake up in the morning. chris is shovelling us out from yesterday's snow. i think we got 30cm by the end of it.

i went in for some overtime at work yesterday morning, and after 3 hours the boss called it so we could get home before the weather got worse. she offered me a ride home, because usually i just walk it. she was going on about how with her car, she's never sure if it'll get going again after it's stopped. i jokingly said "well, you can just slow down at the corner, and i'll jump out." we laughed. and then when i went to open the door, she said, "i'll just take this corner if you want to get out here." i look down and the car's still moving. i mean, i was just kidding about the slow down and jump out. ahhh, good times.

out neighbour was being an idiot again last night. whenever she comes home, she's always talking to herself, then she stomps her way up the stairs and blasts the shittiest music i've heard since my sister was in junior high school. last night she had a party with all her blonde buddies who were talking about how tim is cute, but danny's tall, and therefore cuter. it was all very interesting. grrrrrr.

current music: comets on fire, blue cathedral (though i feel like i'm on the acid trip i never took)

me, relatively recent and probably drunk

cute boy voices on the phone

so, i'm at work, and an employee calls in for help with his payroll. he has the cutest accent, and when i ask he tells me he's from newcastle, england. sigh. so we flirt shamelessly. he emails me to tell me that we should be on a beach rather than in this bitch of a climate. and i'm madly in love with a voice now. figures. it's like listening to jude law in alfie. hmmmmm. so today was not a bad day at all. long day, more overtime, cranky people. but perhaps the work dreams will have just a scooch of the sexy now. fingers crossed.

i'm not the only woman who loves a good accent, right? i could listen to him read the phone book or a transcript from the house of commons. i've gotta get me an english boy.


Jude, My Love

-22 and counting

i'm just awaiting the delivery of a large pepperoni pizza from pizza hut. thought i would drop a few lines of my mad scientifix. ha ha ha.

so this morning, the alarm goes off and the first thing i hear is "-22 degrees." as if it isn't hard enough to wake up on a winter morning. blah. anyway. it was a long day at work. 10.5 hours of staring at a computer screen and talking to people who are not in the best of moods themselves. bless overtime. the job isn't bad, but it is seeping its way into my dreams. and not in a sexy way unfortunately.

thanks for the comments anonymous. this bloggy business is kind of addictive. so tempted to write all the boring little details of my days.

current mood: sleepy
current music: fiery furnaces, blueberry boat

hark, the pizza delivery boy.

very giggly

it surprises me how often people still ask me about japan. and everytime someone asks me what it was like, i tell them it was amazing and absolutely crazy. that's why i loved it and that's why i left. i met some of the greatest people i know while i was there, and i saw some beautiful buildings that were older than i could imagine. when i went to nyc last spring, my friend took me to times square to see the lights and all the people, and it wasn't even close to the dotombori glica man, gigantic automated crab or the christmas luminaria in kobe.

many of the japanese people i met were very kind and helpful and giggly. but then i'll never forget the cherry blossom festival i went to at osaka-jo where i and a couple of my girlfriends were told in a few english words and a few more japanese words to leave the country.

that and the winters were awesome in osaka. it hardly ever went below zero. right now it's -9, but it might as well be -30. i've got a hairdryer propped up between my knees to keep my mouse hand from turning black and falling off. christ.

current mood: it's too effing cold here to feel my toes, nevermind a mood
current music: the arcade fire, funeral (#1 on pitchfork's top 50 albums of 2004)

mr. darcy

here's a picture of my kitty cat darcy. doesn't he look evil. i swear it's the only cat picture i'll post. had to get it in there. he's so shiny.

to steal from my friend sib's blog:
current mood: mellow
current music: bloc party bloc party bloc party!!!!

dayboo

the very first posting of a bloggy type. let's just test this thing out...
my friend K just called and i told her that i didn't know what to write. she suggested that i get over that and just write. ok.

ok, so i'm a very lazy person, and I have begun to suck at email. so, how do i stay in touch with my friends travelling in other more exciting places than here? i do what everyone else is doing and go blog. i guess that's my mission statement.